October 15th

I faintly remember hearing about today a few years ago. I am sure I came across it somewhere and I probably said "I'm sorry." quietly to all the moms and dads who had lost a baby. But I didn't give it more thought. And I feel so guilty about that. Now I am part of the club and the day holds more meaning to me than I wish it did.

I wish I wasn't part of this club. I wish my Lucas and Caleb were in the pack n play in the living room taking a nap or crying for a diaper change. And although I love all the amazing women I've met and am grateful for them, I wish none of us would have met under these circumstances.

But we're here, members of this club that we didn't chose or ever want to be a part of. And I love all these amazing women who support each other through all the ups and downs of this journey. And I am AMAZED by the movement that has started to make the WORLD more aware of pregnancy and infant loss. And it all takes my breath away sometimes.

The Wave of Light Ceremony is tonight at LFC (directions here). I am really looking forward to this and the chance to meet some more parents who are without their babies. I hate that I am on this side of it, but I feel the need to embrace the moment and honor my babies with so many others.

I also want to direct everyone's attention to this page. This is the I Am The Face campaign. The goal is to get 2000 faces of women who have lost babies by today. At last count an hour ago we were at 1700! The number 2000 is the number of women in the US who lose their babies EACH DAY! And this page speaks louder than any words ever could.