Thursday, April 17, 2014

One Beautiful Heartbeat

There's Lil' Turkey.  You can see her/his heart lighting up.  Love love love this little baby.  I am breathing the easiest I have since the positive result on the pregnancy test. Just seeing Turkey and a beating heart renews my hope.
I know I've said it before, but it's tough being pregnant after a loss.  I was a nervous wreck this morning.  I knew that once we went in that room there was no turning back.  Up until that moment, I assumed things were okay due to my symptoms being strong and my pants getting smaller.  But once we saw or didn't see a heartbeat, that was that.   And it took a few minutes for me to find Lil' Turkey's heartbeat.  I was trying not to panic as I scanned the screen for that little flicker that means so much.  What a sigh of relief when I saw.  I held back tears of joy, knowing that so far things are looking good.
As far as how I'm doing physically, well I still claim this is the toughest first trimester yet.  The nausea is hit and miss throughout the day.  I think I am figuring out how to control the amount of energy I have, and how I best use it.  My good friend, heartburn, arrived a couple nights ago.  My pants don't fit without the belly band, or I just wear maternity pants.  And the foil taste in my mouth is still sticking around.  But every ill feeling I have just reminds me that baby is growing and healthy.  I try to be grateful for it all.
The appointment went well today.  Heartbeat 174.  Measuring 9 weeks 3 days, right on with my calculated due date of November 17th.  One inch exactly.  Lil' Turkey was sleeping for the ultrasound, so didn't get to see baby move, but I really didn't need to as long as that heart was flickering.

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