Saturday, August 7, 2010

An Angry Ending

So we had our yard sale yesterday and today. Colton and Ethan ran in and out all the time and mingled with some of our shoppers. And many times I would get the questions, "How old are they?" "How many do you have?" or "Are you stopping at two?" Everytime I kept it simple. "They are two and four." "I am chasing two." "I really want more." I really didn't feel like it was the right time to delve into the topic of us losing our twins with these complete strangers. There were many times when I almost did, but thought better about it.

Then there were the massive numbers of pregnant women that stopped by to shop. I would almost ask how far along they were, or if they were having a boy or girl, or when they were due. But then I realized the expression on my face would probably change if I received certain answers.

Then today a young girl (18 or 19) came by with her baby girl. She was pushing a stroller and carrying her baby in a front carrier. I went inside and let Willy help her. I didn't want to seem rude, but wasn't feeling up for it. After 10 minutes she was still standing there. It is 90+ degrees outside and the sun is HOT!!!! I went out and asked Willy if she was needing something and he told me she was waiting for her mom to bring some money.

After a few more minutes I finally asked her if she would like some sunblock for the baby. She said yes, please. I was hoping she would put it on her little girl, but she wasn't grabbing for the bottle. This baby girl is the first baby I have touched since Lucas and Caleb were born. And I did it, I survived it. I also found out she is 22 weeks old.

10 minutes later (25+ minutes in the sun) I told her she could follow me to the shade tree and sit down. Would have sooner, but I thought her mom was on her way. Anyway we get to talking and I find out she had a son who would have turned two last week. He had died from SIDS when he was two weeks old. They had been co-sleeping without a co-sleeper. This hit me hard. I then told her I understand how hard it is to lose a child and told her part of our story.

Her mom showed up, they bought some stuff, then all got in her car and drove off. And then the anger really hit! HER MOM WAS SMOKING IN THE CAR WITH THE WINDOWS UP!!!!! I would truly think that after losing a child to SIDS, a mom and/or grandma would be extrememly cautious with any known causes/factors of SIDS. Then it all piled on....baby in the heat, no sunblock, no hat, mom smoking in car. Seriously, I understand she's a young mom, but she is one that should really know better.

I think it's a good thing I was able to release some of my pent up anger. And I am glad I didn't aggressively take it out on anyone. Now I just really feel sad for the young mother and her little baby girl.

1 comment:

  1. Wow. I would think that after losing a baby to SIDS, I would be so overly cautious with the next one. I hate seeing people smoke around babies, but in a car with the windows closed! That is too much. I'm so glad you gave that baby some sunscreen.

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