01/31/12

I am having flashbacks.  My due date with this baby is one week after Lucas and Caleb's due date. This adds just a little more to the emotional factor.  I was in church on Sunday, and was talking to someone about this pregnancy, while remembering so well having a a very similar conversation the same time two years ago.  One week.  That is really not much of a difference.  I knew, going into last cycle that if we conceived, that they would be close.  I didn't really plan on it being like this, though.  It's hard.  There are some holidays and events coming up where I was pretty much as pregnant during them two years ago.  And it tugs on the heart.

I miss my babies.  Being pregnant with Cinco is great, and I love every moment of it, but at times it makes me miss Lucas and Caleb more.  I know this pregnancy is going to be an emotional roller coaster, and I am ever so grateful for everyone walking it with me.  Every little thing is going to send my mind rushing to damage control.  But they will also send me to my knees.  I spend a lot of time praying.  Thanking the Lord for this baby, and asking for Him to let me keep Cinco.   It helps knowing that I'm not the only one praying. 

On other news, Colton received a blue stripe on his white belt in martial arts for knowing all the kicks for his belt test.  I am proud of this kid.  He had thought about quitting, then suddenly decided to stick with it a while longer.  He's doing really well.  And he tested for his instructor by himself in front of ten other kids.  Pretty amazing to watch my 5 year old do that!